Akismet – Top Notch Customer Service? Not Quite…

Last Saturday I posted about my issues with my comments going into Spam. I was able to contact Akismet and one of their nice people fixed things up for me. However, my comments started going into spam again mid-week, so I contacted them again. This time, another Akismet employee contacted me and I’m going to publish the email I was sent. I went ballistic but I admit that I’m not exactly objective. Let me know what you think. Especially if you think I am wrong to be pissed off.

Thanks for getting back in touch. It looks like your commenting behavior keeps triggering our spam checks. I would recommend you slow down the rate at which you’re commenting. Comments are meant to be discussions about the topics in the post, not rapid instant-messaging style communication or trying to comment on as many posts as possible. If you comment on posts through the WordPress.com Reader, try visiting the site instead to leave a comment.

This behavior does mimic the behavior of an actual spambot, so I’d just slow down and be more thoughtful about your commenting going forward.

I hope that clarifies things! Let us know if you have any questions.

I LIVE to comment. And I’ve been commenting like this since 2016. So to be told it’s my fault? Doesn’t sit well.

Poor me. I am totally the victim here. And I plan to milk this for all it’s worth. I’m thinking a GoFundMe for emotional scarring and psychological damage. I’m pretty cut up and I’m wondering about stopping book reviewing and getting into the Ironing Scene. I hear it’s the hot new thing.

55 thoughts on “Akismet – Top Notch Customer Service? Not Quite…

      1. I didn’t even know there was such a thing before receiving my first canned response from Amazon, but by gosh, they’ve really perfected that to an art in itself. Zero responsive / actually helpful contents, “vicitim” (customer) blaming, the whole program. In every single one. 😦

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Let that be a lesson to you! How dare you leave lots of comments for other people! Communicate only if and when your masters command ….I guess ironing is the only way out, and that blog looks pretty sweet, but …DON’T CHANGE LORD BOOKSTOOGE!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know, right? And the assumption that I need to change my behavior to fit the parameters of a program instead of the program being changed to work for me? THAT is almost the very definition of an AI overlord 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Wait what?? That’s just completely insane! Like you I’m one who loves to comment on posts (which is why I’ve had this issue myself quite a few times as well). But seriously them dictating how you should comment is about as ludicrous a thing as I have ever heard! They are basically saying: “ stop following too many blogs, and comment only on one of them each day! “ It’s crazy and nuts. Why provide the ability to provide comments on posts in the first place, if they can’t handle their stuff? Totally nuts!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly. If the program can’t handle the job, then change it.
      What really gets me is that previously they had done such a good job of responding and tweaking things so my comments didn’t go into spam. And then to get this? Astounding!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It really is astounding…it’s almost like they are saying: “ Hey you did this to yourself, don’t blame us you know! “ Totally nuts, that’s what I call it! Oh well…In the meantime I will continue to check the spamfilters as much as I can…it’s all we can do I guess😔

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh wow, that’s the type of stuff you should print and hang on your awards wall… How dare you leaving comments, you spamming bot pretending to be Bookstooge! You sure do it on purpose so that poor Akismet has more work cleaning after you… And how dare you read so fast?! I’m sure there’s a punishment for it… 🤣
    Seriously though, that person… Knows how to keep customers happy, eh?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, there’s a punishment for it all right, I’m experiencing it :-/

      Other times that I’ve contacted Akismet, they’ve done a good job of either tweaking things (whatever that actually means) or just telling me they have no idea. But this? My blood pressure definitely rose a good bit.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Indeed. It would be like wordpress telling us we can’t post unless our posts are X long and took X amount of time write.

      The utter ridiculousness of the situation is incredible (in a bad way, hahahaha)

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m definitely very unhappy at the moment. I did consider using some very inflammatory, clickbait’ish kind of words for my title, but at this point, I’m not quite ready to go that far.

      I did respond to the email and ask to be connected to another rep, one who would try to actually fix my problem. We’ll see what happens.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Ughhhh, right? My first reaction was to mentally use a lot of words I don’t ever say, I have to admit.

      I just don’t get the thought process that says “Our program is the be all and end all, so change your behavior to fit it”. The program is supposed to serve OUR needs, not us serve ITS needs. Sigh…

      Like

    1. And that is exactly what I don’t get. I’m not even one of those sites that just repins/reposts/whatever other people’s stuff. I put out genuine posts, and have been for years. But because my commenting behavior breaks Akismet’s mold, I’m the one at fault?

      Sigh. I have a bad feeling I’m going to annoyed all weekend long :-/

      Liked by 1 person

  4. That response is ridiculous. By telling you what comments are meant to be like, and implying that your comments aren’t those things, they’re throwing out a whole bunch of backward insults all at once.

    It’s also ignorant of or dismissive of the diversity of their user base. WordPress has, from my understanding, a huge variety of blogs and bloggers. For some bloggers/topics, short, quick comments are entirely appropriate. Not everybody has the time or interest to write an essay in response to a blog, nor does every blog post warrant an essay in response. Likewise, not every blogger has the time or desire to read essays and respond to essays with more essays.

    Just speaking for my interactions in other places, I enjoy the occasional in-depth conversation and am guilty of some long comments myself, but I also have fun receiving the shorter, simpler comments. I’m glad they represent the majority of the comments I get because they’re easier to fit into my schedule. If I received the same number of comments and they were ALL in-depth essays, I’d probably stop posting my reviews publicly because I just don’t have that kind of time.

    Hopefully, since you’ve had better responses with other attempts, this is the voice of a single snotty individual and isn’t reflective of the attitudes of most of their employees.

    Hopefully this comment was long enough to not be misconstrued as spam. :p

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Telling me to change is what pissed me off. The whole point is to fix the system, which is Akismet, not me 😀

      As for spam, I check it daily. You never know when someone else’s poor little comment is going to be attacked by Akismet.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. That was pretty much my response. I’d had a 10hr day at work, was wiped out emotionally from some other blogging stuff (this bleeding editor is getting under my skin) and this on top of everything was just too much.

      Especially when I’d had such good responses from akismet staff earlier that same week!

      Like

  5. The first rule of Commenting is you don’t talk about Commenting. The second rule of Commenting is you only Comment when we tell you to. Welcome to Clown World!
    p.s. I always suspected you were secretly a spambot. C’mon, admit it. You are Skynet, right?.. How much time do we have left?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So, forget the Matrix, we’re in Clown World, eh? It would explain a lot, wouldn’t it?

      I knew at some point someone would figure out my secret. Yes, my master plan was revealed in Genesys and I am now here, in human flesh! Mwhahahahaaa.

      You have just enough time to send me all your money 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Wow… Just wow… If I ever get such a message from them, I know I’d probably burst. Not only to tell a blogger who has been at it for years on what a comment is supposed to look like but to also tell you the frequency at which you should do them? They clearly have no idea how spambots work if they’re blaming you for this… Although… Maybe you can draw some positive to being compared to the speed of a bot? 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. If you ever check out some of the ummm, “conversations” that 10Seconds and I have and look at the time stamps? Yeah…… 😀

      Thankfully, this were taken care of so now I can write as fast as I want, hahahahaa

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Thanks for getting back in touch. It looks like your commenting behavior keeps triggering our spam checks. I would recommend you slow down the rate at which you’re commenting. Comments are meant to be discussions about the topics in the post, not rapid instant-messaging style communication or trying to comment on as many posts as possible. If you comment on posts through the WordPress.com Reader, try visiting the site instead to leave a comment.

    This behavior does mimic the behavior of an actual spambot, so I’d just slow down and be more thoughtful about your commenting going forward…

    Askimet seriously what the actual fuck mate??? I do posts just so I can have STOOGE come over and comment and now you spam him? How about you HIRE an actual fucking person to read each comment and make an informed decision, do want to have a Salty Mc Dave interaction? You got it by the way. First block editor and now this shit? It’s Hard enough dealing with the Pandemic to also have to deal with your weak ass excuse of a program. Pull your socks up or Ill punch you in the fucking mouth. We share our thoughts just to provoke potential people’s thoughts and interactions, not for some brainless program to decide what is relevant in the comment or not, fuck off!

    Sorry Stooge, I could not keep the other guy back from the keyboard… But I do understand where his anger is coming from.

    Liked by 1 person

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