PSA: The Oxford Comma – An Abomination Before Bookstooge

~ Bookstooge

PSA

 

The Oxford Comma, the Oxford comma, and the oxford comma. Oh where to begin on this horrible travesty that has infested the purity of English grammar?

First off, a small grammar lesson so you know WHAT the oxford comma is, just in case you weren’t aware of this filthy betrayal.  When writing a list of 3 or more items, you put a comma between items and then an “and” between the final items. Example:  Bookstooge loves alcohol, cigarettes and pork.  The disgusting perps who use the oxford comma would write that sentence as thus: Bookstooge loves alcohol, cigarettes, and pork.

The communists who love this abomination will trot out example after example of why the oxford comma is so superior. Here are a couple of funny cartoons to show their propaganda.

the-oxford-comma_52c855ed979ed_w1500

 

stalin

Now why would I have a problem with making something more clear and easy to understand? BECAUSE THERE ARE ALREADY GRAMMAR RULES DEALING WITH THIS ISSUE AND IT ENCOURAGES LAZY AND BAD WRITING.

 

If you can not communicate clearly what you are trying to get across and need an extra comma, then you are a terrible writer and I’m going to guess a pretty bad person too. The reason it frustrates me so much is because all it takes is a little bit of grammar skill to avoid such “pitfalls” as the Oxford Comma Collaborators put forth. It encourages bad, sloppy and lazy writing and dumbs down the rules for the idiots who shouldn’t be writing in the first place!

With the advent, and continued rise, of the indie writers, we as readers should not be accepting of anything that allows them to continue to be bad writers. We should be expecting them to improve as they write and to learn the rules and the skills they need.

skillz
The mindset of the typical oxford comma user

 

So when you are writing and are tempted to use the oxford comma to get out of re-writing your sentence, just remember, Demon Goat will be waiting for you.

the-satanic-goat-is-going-to-murder-you_o_5533197

 

 

 

bookstooge (Custom)

 

40 thoughts on “PSA: The Oxford Comma – An Abomination Before Bookstooge”

  1. LOL, I have to admit I didn’t know what an Oxford comma was. That’s how we were taught in my school, so I think I still use it out of habit. Comma usage isn’t something I get too excited about, but I have my share of pet peeves. For example, why, why, WHY do so many people use the word “defiantly” when they mean “definitely”? I would also like to reach through the computer and strangle a certain colleague who overuses ellipses, question marks, and exclamation points. Every now and then I take great satisfaction in using an ellipsis back at her and knowing she has absolutely no idea how much sarcasm is dripping from those dots…

    (If I’m slow to reply to comments, it’s because I’m leaving soon to go visit the family.)

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. Congrats on getting time to spend with family. Enjoy it to the hilt!

      It is funny what gets people going about grammar, isn’t it? I know I am wicked guilty of using ellipses all the time, especially online. I suspect it it is because I don’t want the conversation to “end” and so give that impression with the ellipse. I guess you’ll just have to put up with it from me…
      😉

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      1. Thanks! 🙂 Ha, I haven’t noticed any ellipses over-usage from you. My colleague uses them after nearly every sentence. The first time I started IMing with her, I thought she didn’t believe anything I was telling her. Every time I answered a question or gave her some instructions, she’d respond with an “ok…” and then shortly afterwards she’d ask me questions that I had already answered. The “ok…” read to me like there was an unstated “if you say so” after it and the repeated questions made me think she thought my answers were weird or wrong or something. And the frequent extra ?’s made me think she wanted to sound incredulous. Eventually I figured out that her reading comprehension stinks, the ellipses are just a weird habit, and not everybody reads as much meaning into punctuation as I do. Oops, was that an Oxford comma? So sorry! 😉

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  2. LOL 😀 Demon goat is quite cute tho!
    When i was in school, we were taught not to put comma before “and”. Admittedly, we also didn’t write in English, or knew what oxfordians were doing or not doing 😀

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    1. But then WHO would let the world know what to think? I am a tireless crusader against anything (I don’t like) and hence, the very fabric of our society depends on me.

      In short, I’m just too important and the people demand my presence.

      And you’re a communist. (now there’s a clincher to close any argument!!!)

      😉

      Liked by 1 person

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    1. Demon Goat and I have a deal. I make ALL the grammar errors I want to, worry free and in exchange, I just have to feed him the souls of the damned indie authors. I consider it a win-win for everyone!

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  6. Wow- people are daft. It’s hard enough getting people to understand *actual* grammar- but apparently we need to complicate things with made-up rules for people who are too dense to understand how a sentence like “we invited the strippers, JFK and stalin” (admittedly, I now want to use that eg forever). It just… boggles the mind. No, I won’t be using the Oxford comma- because (ironically) it’s grammatically incorrect and incorrect grammar winds me up. This is just another case of numptys running amok with hypercorrection. No matter what justification they try to come up with, they’ll always be wrong. I hope demon goat does get these imbeciles (rant over 😉 )

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  10. I was not taught the Oxford comma method (I think it’s also called the “serial comma”) but I do prefer it. I think because it’s a more antiquated method and I’ve always thought that people used to be smarter, therefore smart people use the Oxford comma. What logic, huh! :-Z However, now looking at your propaganda, it makes even more sense to me. Probably not the result you were hoping for, lol!

    My personal pet grammar peeve is when people confuse “then” and “than”. It is soooo obvious when you should use each that I’m mind-boggled when people make that error.

    Liked by 2 people

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    1. Actually, the oxford comma came about in the late 1800’s and early 1900’s I believe. From some jackass in a publishing house. Me and publishers, at war before I was even born! 😀

      As for then and than, I have to admit, I usually ask Mrs B when I’m not sure (about a quarter of the time).

      Liked by 1 person

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  12. I can’t say I’ve ever used the Oxford Comma but I’ve spent a lot of time this year reading nineteenth century literature and writers back then thought it was right to have paragraph long sentences with commas everywhere so, to be quite honest, the fewer commas the better.

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  15. Pingback: November ’18 Roundup & Ramblings | Bookstooge's Reviews on the Road

  16. What the Hell is THIS???

    1 – There’s a bar on the escalator in Hong Kong which, in the mornings, offers “coffee and egg sandwiches”. A well-placed comma would solve a soggy problem…;

    2 – Sometimes it can help the reader: “he ate cereal, kippers, bacon, eggs, toast and marmalade, and tea.” No matter what you do with the comma, that sentence leaves the poor chap eating tea (the leaves presumably). Rewrite service: “He ate cereal, kippers, bacon and eggs, and toast with marmalade, and drank a cup of tea”. Or, to really make the sentence work, change it to: “He ate a McDonalds big breakfast, then vomited copiously into a convenient bucket.”

    3 – I use it as a dramatic pause before the climax of some sentences, and it works! (*Steady now, there will be pedants and grammar Nazis stalking this thread. What you have there is not an serial comma, but an ordinary bog-standard one. Be prepared to be hung, drawn, and quartered by the infidels*);

    4 – Why rely on intelligence and sensitivity to context, of which I, for one, have little, when a wee comma (a much more reliable entity) will do the trick?

    Serial comma vs Cambridge period. Start placing your bets.

    Serial Comma Fans UNITE! There are infidels here!

    NB: Love ellipses for leaving a conclusion in the air…and dashes – very satisfactory.

    Liked by 1 person

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  17. I, for one, know that I use the comma quite a lot in my posts. Sorry if they have caused you discomfort, I apologize… Seriously though. I suck at any kind of grammar. I am getting better at it thanks to some minor adjustments.

    Liked by 1 person

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