Pride and Prejudice and Zombies by Seth Grahame-Smith.
Let me be unequivocally clear about 2 things in regards to this book.
1) I am a HUGE fan of Jane Austen. I have read all her works, even her originally unpublished stories.
2) This is pure trash. I don’t mean popcorn bad for you trash, but full on pedophile serial rapist bad.
Yes, I hate this book with a passion. In fact, I hate this whole Quirk Classics line. Taking great literature and boiling it down to a lowest common denominator is wrong. It is like putting a mustache and devil horns on the Mona Lisa and then claiming that you’re helping modern kids to appreciate real art. I’m not usually a book snob, seeing as how I’m primarily invested in the SFF side of things, but this, it outraged me. YOU DON’T DO THIS.
When I first read and reviewed this, I read a couple of other reviews and had to hold myself back from calling down curses and imprecations on the heads of those idiots who were praising this puerile filth. Praising it!
I’ve seen other Quirk Classic books since and have had no desire to read them. Not even to read them to bash the ever living daylights out of them. I don’t need to read them to know they’re bad just like I don’t need to eat a plate full of manure to state that it tastes bad.
I’m not actually sure I really survived this. It’s been 7 years and even now, reading my old review, I get in a rage. I think this book got the better of me and wounded me beyond help. Man down, man down, MEDIC!!!
*gurgle, cough, spasms, dying breath*

I didn’t think the movie was too bad… *hides in a bush*
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It is a good thing today is the Sabbath and I can’t do any work. Otherwise, I’d have to stone you! 😉
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lol
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Damn, I was hoping that maybe it would be funny. I got a copy at the library sale, at least it was less than a dollar.
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Maybe twinky eating, beer guzzling, trailer trash elves from Correia’s MHI universe would find it funny, but me? I was just angry…
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Crap. I should probably just donate it
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Toss it straight into the garbage. Seriously. Just consider your money a donation to the library.
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That’s probably for the best then
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hahaha I love the way you described this!! And yes, it is trash- I only ever read the first chapter because it came out the year we were studying Pride and Prejudice in school and my teacher thought it might be a good example of parody… obviously she was wrong 😉 I *HATE* shitty versions of classics- the only reasons this isn’t higher up on my hate list is a) cos I only ever read the first chapter, like I said and b) I’ve read some really really godawful remakes (Nutshell, Dorian… etc) So yeah, I can really relate- because this is very much like drawing a moustache on the mona lisa!
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Sometimes teachers make REALLY BAD decisions. Sounds like your teacher did. At least you survived that chapter. I didn’t make it through the whole book. I wish I had noted at what point I gave up back then, as I sure can’t remember now.
This book is one of the reasons I tend to not read retellings/remakes. No one likes a hairy Mona Lisa!
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hahaha it really wasn’t the worst decision- it was an experiment since we’d already finished the syllabus. I just remember when she looked round the room at the end of reading it and asked “soooo is anyone interested in reading the rest of this?” The look on all my classmates faces was a clear “hell no!”
hahahaha 😂😂 Too true! 😉
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I do agree with you it was not really as good as it seemed. Honestly when I first heard about it I was super excited but then I opened the book and discovered a super feminist Lizzy and a weak Darcy, why quirk books, why? Also the plot line is pretty boring you don’t see the use of zombies in the story they only make brief apparitions…. Words of caution do not mix Buffy and Lizzy they are both great but on their own…
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Hey, good to see you again! You’ve been gone over a month from your blog. I trust everything is ok?
It was poor execution coupled with the mangling of one of my favorite books that induced the Hulk [Literary] Rage.
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Hey again ^^ work was kind off crazy with Christmas approaching (I swear when you work in a bookshop Christmas sound like an army of goblins invading Gondor …) so I had to put the blog on hold a bit but I am back 😀 how are you besides slightly put off by mix of romance and zombies ?
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Mrs Bookstooge works retail, so I understand.
Life is good. Climbed a mountain last week. Then had snow on Tuesday. I have pictures in posts to prove it too 🙂
Been in a feel busy kind of mood so haven’t actually gotten that many books read. Hoping to binge on some books over Thanksgiving though. 4day weekend for me this coming week, whoohoo!!
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I feel for Mrs Bookstooge.
Snooow! I think November is generally pretty busy but December is always better because it’s cozyness is like an invitation to reading. Nice I hope the books will be better than this one ;).
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I’ve got a couple of good ones lined up, so I’m hoping things will go well.
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Hahaha this review made me laugh so hard! 😂😂
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I am glad my pain, agony and mental suffering brought such cheer and joy into your life
😉
hehehehehee
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Bahahaha it really did! Thanks so much for that 😉
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I refuse to read anything like this. I am not a huge Jane Austen fan but I respect what she did for the craft of writing. I’m an author, myself. Any bastardising of original ideas is offensive to me.
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Thank you for using the word “offensive”. I think that really captures what put me off so badly about this as well.
As a writer, are you participating in that Nanowrimo thing?
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Nah, I get why some people do it but it’s never been for me. When I have an idea I need to get down I don’t need that time scale as motivation. I’d also feel too rushed.
I havdn’t written in a while. Been searching for a new publisher since my old one folded 😦
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Who did you publish with?
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It was a small press called Three Ravens. My book is still available on kindle just not paperback. It also means the sequel never saw the light of day. A cruel fate for a duology 😂
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Ouch!
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Bookstooge, can you show me on this doll where Seth Grahame-Smith hurt you?
Seriously, not an Austen fan, but listening to an interview with the top dog at Quirk a couple of ago got me semi-interested in it, but I never bothered. Know I won’t now.
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Hahahahaha! He touched me, right in the feelz!!!
I’m trying to think of a book that I wouldn’t mind this treatment being given to and even Hardy doesn’t deserve it. And I really am not a fan of him.
Yeah, save yourself the waste of time it would be.
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When I first discovered this line of books that turned classics into… these jokes, I couldn’t believe it was a thing. I haven’t read them, but I couldn’t imagine myself taking them seriously.. ever..
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I hope you never get interested enough to try them. I consider them a complete waste, of everything 😦
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Yeh. No. I don’t have enough time in my hands to even test one of them out anyways. 😀 Your thoughts on them only confirms my decision to stay far from them too.
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“It is like putting a mustache and devil horns on the Mona Lisa…” This describes exactly how I feel about these classic mashups and is the main reason why I don’t really read them. And if that makes me sound like a book snob, then so be it 😛
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*pinky salute*
Welcome to the ranks, Sister!
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I haven’t read this and at the back of my mind I always wanted to – just to see what the crack was – maybe not now after reading this. Don’t want to graffiti the Mona Lisa after all. I have read some retellings and enjoyed them, well, not so much retellings as revisiting from a different angle/pov. Longbourn by Jo Baker was quite good – told from the servants perspective, although it did take a few liberties – particularly with Mr Bennet.
Lynn 😀
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Did you read my original review [the link right at the beginning] from ’10? That sums up the content pretty well, sadly. Not so much a retelling as a complete gutting, right down to the spinal cord.
I just don’t see how anyone can justify the time spent on this trash. Writing OR reading 😀
I’m not even trying to be objective here, just in case you couldn’t tell 🙂
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Haha – I just read your review – very good. I suppose the thing that has always surprised me with books like this is why use somebody else’s work to write your zombie book, why not just write a regency period book with zombies? Or is that too radical?
Lynn 😀
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I don’t know, that sounds a lot like work to me!
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We have this one on our shelves. My wife wanted to throw it away (not sell it or give it away, bin it) because she hated it. She is also an Austen fan. I didn’t let her because I wanted to read it, and am yet to get to it. I’m sensing this may have been a mistake…. Oh, and the movie of it was unwatchable rubbish.
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Good for Mrs Tyson! I wholeheartedly agree with her, obviously 🙂
I couldn’t believe that they made a movie. I’ve never heard anything about it, so I figured it kind of wandered off into obscurity.
So another vote to chuck the book into the garbage. To show how thankful you are for all the good books out there 😉
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I saw the movie they made out of this and “meh!” was the kindest comment I could offer, so I knew I might never read the book: now that I’ve seen your post, that’s become a certainty! 🙂
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Excellent, then I have succeeded in my quest of saving others!
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Have you read any of the “mannerpunk” books like the Glamourist Histories or Sorcerer to the Crown?
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I have not. The reviews I read for “Sorcerer to the Crown” led me to the impression that I wouldn’t enjoy it.
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I loved it. (My review is below.) If you’re going to try something like that, I would start with Sorcerer to the Crown. It is better than any of the Glamourist books (which get better as they go, so start off somewhat weak). The other big one, of course, is Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell, but I haven’t read it. I also haven’t read any actual Austen, so you should probably take all of this with a grain of salt (Kowal, at least, uses a database of every word in every Austen novel to help keep her books as close stylistically as possible.)
https://everydayshouldbetuesday.wordpress.com/2015/09/02/review-of-sorcerer-to-the-crown-by-zen-cho/
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And that is what turned me off the most, the comparisons to Strange and Norrel. I hated that book even though on the surface I should have been drooling over it.
And part of the problem is the whole artificial styling. I like that Dickens, Austen, etc, wrote like they did. But I want writers of today to WRITE like writers of today, even if I complain about it.
Will check out your review…
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I was going to read this book because it’s PRIDE AND PREJUDICE!! But now, I’m probably not going to. I don’t want it to ruin the original for me.
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Yeah, if you enjoy the original in any way, stay away from this whole line of trash. There is nothing good in them…
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Hilarious!
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Thank you 🙂
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“It is like putting a mustache and devil horns on the Mona Lisa and then claiming that you’re helping modern kids to appreciate real art.”
I love your metaphor! Haha! When you put it that way I feel kind of bad that I actually kind of liked it back when I first read it. I wouldn’t have pegged you for a Jane Austen fan.
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In all honesty, I wouldn’t peg me as an Austen fan either. I can barely tolerate romance in the books I read, even the hint of it, much less the drama’y kind that the likes of Lindsay Buroker writes.
But Austen, I’ll eat it up with a spoon. I don’t know if it is because of the “classic” monniker or something else, but I do love her books 😀
So, when you read this piece of work, had you already read P&P, or did it compel you to seek out the original?
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I had already read P&P so that’s why I think I kinda liked Zombies at the time and took it as a funny parody. Maybe not a good one but I found it entertaining haha.
I’ve been wanting to read more Austen but at the rate I’m going I don’t think it’ll be soon.
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